Before I start I just want to say that I am not a person who skydives out of planes or gets into cages and allows herself to be lowered into shark infested waters. My life is not defined as being a risk-taker, though through some eyes I am defined as something very similar.
I am a woman.
All my life people have told me I can be anything I want to be if I worked hard and put my mind to it. And all my life those same people have told me to “always watch my drink” to “watch how you dress” to “be cautious and always look over your shoulder” and especially “never walk home, especially alone, at night”.
Entertaining the fact that I grew up most of my life in the land of opportunities, the USA, I suppose I had it better than most. But that was until I realized that while my streets weren’t being bombed every night by a militia with twisted religious views, a silent war was being declared on half of the population by people very similar.
Women in general seem to be getting pushed farther and farther back into a role we have been clawing our way out of since the 1950’s. Despite that we make up half the population and more of the work population then the opposite sex, I have learned from those brave enough to speak up over the last couple of years just how much we are unappreciated as a sex and more importantly as an ally to humankind. Politicians especially love to bring up how the appearance of a girl as young as 11 brings her into accountability when someone harasses and even goes as far as to assault her. Blame is being shifted onto the victims shoulder in a horrifying trend that is as damaging as it is unnecessary.
I suppose it all really came to light with Steubenville and the attitude the media had towards the perpetrators of the assault on an intoxicated (passed-out) 16-year-old. They were showered with sympathy over how their bright futures (they were football stars on their high school team) were essentially ruined over the ‘incident’, how their ‘mistake’ has cost them college and scholarship opportunities. The public was made to see these boys as victims just as much of the passed out girl whose vagina they proceeded to penetrate with multiple parts of their bodies. This same girl was also publically reproached for drinking so much to the point she lost consciousness.
That was when the floodgates opened up. Outraged individuals from all over the country bashed the news media on their treatment of sorrow for the criminals (and yes, that is the political correct term for someone like them) and just around that time I saw the most beautiful thing begin to happen. Like flowers blooming the spring I saw women and men come forward and speak out against misogynist views in the work place, in Hollywood, in schools. I saw them call out powerful people over jokes that have been in the expense of others for so long, and for the first time these powerful people were being shamed for it.
My generation is currently giving birth to the future, with many of them vowing to raise their children differently. There are no longer boys and girls toys, just toys. Pink and blue are will just be colors. And so many are now preaching to stop telling their women how to avoid getting raped and are instead telling other to raise their sons to be respectful, to talk about issues facing everyone when they go out into society. To respect each other’s choices and their bodies.
And that is why I tell men to fuck off when they approach me in a private moment and tell me to smile. That is why when someone asks, “Oh, you’re one of those feminists aren’t you?” I reply with, “You mean one of those people who believe in equality amongst the sexes? You mean that type of feminist? The literal definition of a feminist? Yes I am. Why?” And watch what defense they come up with. Why if a man makes me uncomfortable while flirting with me in a public space I will politely tell him to go away, and offer up no other reason than the one previously stated. And if he persists then pull out the classic “fuck off” again. Because I am done with being nice.
And that is also the reason why I will walk home alone at night. For no other reason then I just want to go home, with or without any friends I came with, and am not asking to be attacked, accosted, verbally assaulted, or raped.
I’m just a girl. Walking home
